Struggling to stay positive

The methotrexate hit really hard this time around.

I can barely move.  Had a fever yesterday.  Mild nausea despite it being administered via injection.  I was able to sit up for a few hours last night and have dinner with my family, but went to bed soon after.

Right now I feel just plain awful.  

I’m up with my daughter who is so conditioned to wake up at 6 am due to school.

I feel as if I am weighed down by those lead aprons they put on you when getting an xray.  I feel like I’m wearing those over every square inch of my body.  I have pain in my fingers, wrists, elbows.  Every movement, other than typing, takes extreme effort.  Hell, the typing is taking extreme effort at this point.

I just want to go back to sleep and hopefully sleep this off.  But my husband has done everything this past weekend, and he deserves to sleep in.  Maybe another hour or so before I physically have to return to bed.

I hate this.  But the docs say this medication is what is preserving my sight.  But the side effects on the rest of my body are awful.  

Pain in hands and wrists getting worse..

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