FML

scream

Good Lord.  Can it get any worse?

Well, yes it can.  I’m just blowing off steam here.  But there is a new complication to this entire autoimmune disease odessey.

I started with SEVERE back pain on Monday.  Because I have fibromyalgia, I usually ignore most pain and chalk it up to fibro.

Well, this pain persisted.  Its on the left side and higher than my usual low back pain.  It kind of wraps around my hip.

This pain is alternating stabbing and dull pain.  And I can barely walk.

I have been eating Tramadol more than usual and the pain finally prompted me to see my primary care doc.

After finding blood in  my urine, the doc thinks it might be kidney related.

Really?

She wanted to do an ultrasound immedietly, but since I have no insurance, this would be cost prohibitive right now.

So she put me on a muscle relaxer and told me to take it with the Tramadol.

She said if the pain doesn’t subside by Tuesday, that I will probably need that ultrasound, regardless of cost.

I know from my merticulous reading on the subject, that if I do have a kidney stone, it might be definitive of sarcoidosis.

I took the muscle relaxer last night, along with Tramadol, my usual drug cocktail and my weekly methotrexate dosage.

I woke up with the pain again.

I’m scared.

Really scared.

I haven’t told my husband yet, but since it is a holiday weekend here in the states, I can’t do anything about it until Tuesday.

It will be a miracle if we can make rent this month.  We have begged family members to help in the past few months and they have been extremely generous, but they are weary of our requests.

My husband just completed training for a job that will hopefully be full time and provide benefits.  He’s planning to work two jobs this summer to get us on firm financial footing.

The end is in sight.  It’s just these final weeks that are so hard.  I’m seriously terrified about the money.  I do not want to get evicted, we do not have money to move, and the type of apartment we could move in to is in a bad area.

So I’m not to happy right now.  I’m in pain.  I have to make food for the picnic I’m going on with my friends this weekend.  I at least try to do normal things, even if I’m feeling like hell.

Positive thinking:  This kidney stuff may be how I get a definitive diagnosis.

 

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One thought on “FML

  1. I’m so sorry you can’t afford the ultrasound to find out what’s going on. It has to be really scary just wondering. Could you tell your landlord you can pay x amount now and will get him/her the rest by whatever date? I’ve had landlords in the past be okay with this.

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